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Defective Insurance Corporation of America |
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The Company
That's Happily Combining Corporate
Inefficiencies With Mental Deficiencies |
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Our
headquarters is located in scenic Ranchville, NJ. The town
where people outnumber teeth, two to one. |
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Our people are what makes the difference. They're
smarter than your average Moron, you know. |
"Incompetence is the key to our own special blend of
inefficiency, confusion and chaos" states CEO Craig Mirthy.
"But incompetence has to begin, remain and be centered
around the very top, in order to have the greatest
impact.", he adds. "Take our IT department as an
example. Headed up by Ron Silliams. This guy is an
idiot! But what makes him most dangerous is his complete
refusal to acknowledge the sheer magnitude of his own
idiocy. This is important." Craig takes a sip
of his Old Milwaukee and continues: "This guy hand picks
the morons directly below him. That's an important
component as well. What good does it do if only the
man at the helm is a moron? You need a staff of
subordinate morons to agree with and implement his
ridiculous policies. But that's the basic management
structure we use here at Defective Insurance."
He takes
another sip of his Old Milwaukee, belches, breaks wind and
continues "You see, we do have some competent and
intelligent people working within our organization. Which
makes it all the more important that the people on the top
are such morons. Now, I'm not saying that everyone
in management is a moron. There are some intelligent
people who occasionally fall through the cracks.
That can't be helped. But as soon as we discover
their general lack of moronic tendencies, they are out of
here!" Craig pauses to open a can of Meister
Brau, takes a sip, belches, breaks wind, coughs, spits and
continues: "The beauty of the business that we are in is
this: Insurance is a scam! It's the biggest scam
going. Second only to the sale of swampland in
Florida. Coincidentally, we also sell swampland in
Jersey as a side venture. But as far as insurance is
concerned, all we have to do is tell people that we are
going to be there for them in their time of need.
Then when misfortune occurs, we abandon them. They
really think that we actually care, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
What a riot! Oh, this is off the record, right?" |
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Note: The
contents of this page are just a parody of the Insurance
Industry, this company does not really exist. Don't be a
dumb-ass by believing otherwise! This is our
official disclaimer. |
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Defective Insurance Corporation Is Just Another Demented Division Of
PsychotiCorp |
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